If you've read part one and two of Detox the Mind, you've probably identified some hindering beliefs and fears about you and life. Take some time to reflect on how these beliefs shape your experiences.
Life mirrors beliefs.
Every negative, fear-based belief we hold shapes our choices. It is natural to turn away from discomfort and avoid whatever stands between us and our desires, but when we resolve to confront our false beliefs, we may discover that they dissipate easily.
For example, at one point in my life I was uneducated (last grade completed 8th), I'd made many "bad" choices (teen mom, abusive ex, beyond broke) and I truly believed that I was a child of a lesser god. I lived in constant discomfort and fear, but tucked beneath the weight of my miserable world, I had dreams. I wanted to be someone who I admired.
I started working on myself (inner work – I'll elaborate soon) and my life changed quickly, so quickly that I found myself facing fears that once paralyzed me and watching them dissolve.
The first was being invited to events given by my new employer. Everyone in the room had Master's degrees, a couple of homes, and had traveled the world. I was terrified that they'd single me out for being inferior. I quickly learned that they were just people, too. And the people who did turn out to be jerks, were jerks to everyone, not just me. My fear was baseless.
Similarly, when I showed up for my first day of law school, after never completing high school or getting an undergraduate education, I was mortified by the belief that the other students would all figure out that I was a clueless, moron who had no business sitting next to them. It never happened. Instead, I was awarded Student of the Year.
In both examples, my underlying belief was: I'm not worthy of being here. I now know that isn't true. Some beliefs are best released by doing and thus proving their falsehood. This is an outer approach. The inner work I refer to above gave me the confidence to go out and try. We'll look at that in my next post.
I chose to write about the outer work first because I wanted to give some concrete examples of how working with our beliefs can transform our lives. As an avid student of self improvement teachings, I am always disheartened if the person teaching hasn't demonstrated the effectiveness of the principles they espouse. I have many more personal examples relating to all aspects of life.
The most important thing to know is that we are made of the same stuff and have access to the same universal power and support. You can achieve what others have done and more, if that is your desire.
The only limiting factor in your life is you.
Photo Credit: The tremendous Temari09
So true! I am my own worst enemey. Love reading your blogs.
Dear Cynthia,My first visit to your site; I was pleasantly rewarded: read the three “Detox” installments, and your post in BlogHer: nice work, nice words!Ideas I particularly liked: “Embracing and letting go of limiting beliefs is the single greatest step we can take toward the realization of our destiny.”, and your view of the effects of “beliefs”, dovetail with my views on inter-generational family dynamics and the perpetuation of personal limits driven by cycles of baseless ignorance, bias, prejudice, and fear (whew!). When parents address “limiting beliefs”, not only can they advance toward their destiny, but, will affect more self-supportive beliefs in their children. Kids may not at first know their destiny, (I call it passion), but, they can begin their journey toward its discovery less encumbered by self-doubt and fear, when parents do the same.I know you said identifying the problem’s source was not as important as the doing something about it… I agree, once the “toxins” are implanted. However, though parental behavior is but one of a limited number of important influences in a child’s “process of discovery”, it can be pivotal in the establishment and growth of the character of a child’s view of “self” potentials, like confidence, respect, reliance, control, love, et al.As you said, in life, there will always be challenges: some obvious, some not so much. But, the better the base, the stronger the wall.I believe a paraphrase of some Mark Twain wisdom applies: "What we don't know cannot harm us nearly as much as what we are sure of, which is wrong!" And, I believe we have stumbled back to your point: Beliefs which limit are toxic and wrong; therein is the harm.Thanks for the words, the wisdom, and the way!Lawson Meadows
AfinesenArt:I love having YOU here.Cynthia
Lawson:What a treat to find you here! Weeks ago, I became a follower of yours on HuffPost after reading your comments on Anne Naylor and Judith Rich's blogs. You are a phenomenal advocate for families and children. Most recently, you made the following comment and its been rolling around in my head:"How people interact is a reflection of form; whether they maintain integrity reflects substance."Substance. That's what matters. I have done my best to mother under the WYSIWYG (what you see is what you get) principle. I am an engaged communicator and share the best of what I know, but I am keenly aware that lest I walk the talk, it's all puffery.I completely agree with and have experienced the inter-generational effects negative emotions and beliefs have on children and grandchildren. I am descended of 3 teenage mothers who felt that life must be a struggle and every positive thing is hard won. I was the fourth.My greatest achievement is transcending that cycle so my daughter has a different view and experience.I'm reading your writings and gleaning so much. Thank you.Be well,Cynthia
This is a good blog. Keep up all the work. I too love blogging and expressing my opinions. Thanks 🙂
Cynthia, I am so proud of you and what you have became. And now, you are able to inspire so many with your experiences and your wisdom. This is truly a wonderful blog. Though I share most of your thoughts, I could not have said it better. Thanks.
Hello Cormel:Thank you. It is wonderful to have a forum to share.Cynthia
Hi LionGirl:It's really nice to see you again. I think you do a very successful job of expressing yourself and inspiring others. After all, that is how we met :)Cynthia