Jealousy. A heavy, matted sensation settled in my belly. It showed up to ruin my day and it looked as though it would succeed. I’m human and I still feel this ugly sensation sometimes. It usually rears up when I see someone living an experience that I want to have. When I was younger, these feelings would take me on days-long trips into self-criticism, comparison, and destruction. My jealously served to highlight and reinforce every complaint my inner-critic had about me. It was vicious and exacerbated by the self-loathing that comes from feeling jealous in the first place.
Thankfully, I’ve learned to understand and appreciate the purpose of jealousy.
Jealousy is the projection of negative feelings derived from the recognition of our deepest desires coupled with a (false) belief that we can’t have them–it’s not about the person or thing you’re feeling jealousy towards–it’s about you.
Instead of letting your ego launch a campaign of self-destruction, the work is to identify the desire that’s seeking expression and to thank the Universe for triggering your awareness of it.
The next time you find yourself jealously fixated on an individual, look at what it is about them that you want for your life. Examine whether it’s really your heart’s desire or something you were conditioned to want. If it’s your genuine desire, put a plan together, get whatever help you need, and go for it.
Use the energy you feel to create something positive in your life. Jealousy is a gift.
The opportunity in feeling jealous is to reveal what you really want, acknowledge that
it’s possible for you, and to give yourself the chance to say yes, no, or not now, to it.
It’s a call to focus on what you deeply desire and to do something about it.
Have you discovered the gifts of jealousy? Tell me below. I read all comments.
~ Cynthia