We cannot obtain what we lack if we tenaciously cling to what we have. –Charles F. Haanel
I posted the above quote on my Facebook Page. In response, I received emails and comments requesting clarification of its meaning. I do not profess to know precisely what it meant to its author, but I am happy to share my interpretation.
Essentially, this quote describes aspects of release and surrender. Many view this negatively, as though it signifies defeat, failure, loss, poverty, or disappointment. It doesn’t. The release and surrender of an outcome, desire, belief, relationship, or thing too, and for, the Highest Good is always an improvement.
Often, by clinging to what we have we delay or prevent the emergence of what we really need, deserve, or are intended to have. We must give to receive.
Here are some examples:
You’re in the wrong relationship, but you’re clinging so tightly to the belief that there are no good men out there, or you’re too old, fat, uneducated, worthless, etc. to attract one if there is, or you’ll never make it on your own. These are beliefs, not truths; there are people out there, just like you, who are building healthy, happy relationships today. There are countless others who, finally in their aloneness, are able to live out their dreams. Your tightly grasped beliefs are preventing your good from coming to you. Give up the negative belief to receive a positive outcome.
You want to sing, dance, act, or speak publicly, but you’re too shy. For as long as you cling to a belief in shyness as a part of YOU, you will not fulfill your dream. You are not shy. Shyness exists within you and your past. You can let go, you can choose to take small consistent steps toward building stage presence and confidence. Trade shyness for radiance.
You want to live a big life and create real change, but you’re afraid to take strides toward your dreams, to risk failure and rejection. You’re clinging to your small life to avoid pain. You cannot stand in achievement or magnificence and stay in the comfort of littleness or the delusion of unworthiness too. Man up (you too, ladies) and give your littleness away.
You want to be wealthy and easily afford your life, but you think rich people are jerks. Your unconscious will sabotage every opportunity for wealth. Money is neutral energy and there are plenty of poor jerks out there. Exchange the belief that poor equals goodness for the belief that wealth enables massive giving.
You want to feel feminine and beautiful, but your mother taught you that women who express their inherent charms diminish womankind. Release that backwards programming and decide that your beauty is a sacred gift from your Creator.
What you have is good, but you crave something better. This desire stays with you, outlasting compulsive wanting and egoic showmanship; it rests at your core, triggering thoughts of purpose, destiny, and calling, but you remain in the safety and comfort of normalcy. You must release what is good so what is best can manifest.
You have a clear picture of what it will take to make you happy. Anything other than this thing, condition, person, or place and you will be miserable. This is a dangerous delusion. By hinging your happiness on outer events, you are destined for misery. Your human mind and its companion, the ego, have no real understanding of happiness or of what outcome is for your greatest good. You must let go of what you know so that what is right and true for you can emerge.
You’re working on a project. You’ve done all you possibly can and now the outcome is in someone else’s hands. Let go of worry, anxiety and frenetic mental machinations. Surrender it to the power that beats your heart and turns the planets, surely it can handle your concerns. If the outcome doesn’t go the way your mind/ego desires, trust that it is for your highest good. Something is seeking to emerge. Whether it be a skill, attribute, strength, or better opportunity, all things, ultimately, work together for good.
Everything has gone wrong. Ruin is the order of the day. You’re trying to salvage, repair, or reconstruct a war-zone. Let go. Begin again. Release your grasp on yesterday’s dream. Invest in you, today. Create your very best self now. What is yours will remain and what you need will come. Trust that a power greater than you is on the scene. Give your best today and let Her do the rest.
To shed light on Charles Haanel’s intention behind his quote, I leave you with another:
Growth is attained through an exchange of the old for the new, of the good for the better; it is a conditional or reciprocal action, for each of us is a complete thought entity and this completeness makes it possible for us to receive only as we give. –Charles F. Haanel
I am learning to let go of the negative in my past so that I can move forward.
It can be difficult. But when you have nothing else to lose sometimes it forces us to make these types of leaps of faith in life.
After having my husband walk out several years ago. I had a lot of anger towards him. I finally got tired of feeling this way and I decided to let go of this feeling. I finally found someone special that loves and cares about me and my kids.
I had to let go of this past to move forward. Yes I have some hurt still but I am healing.
Gabrielle, thank you for sharing the painful parts of your growth. I wish you tremendous good.
Cynthia
I am learning to let go of the negative in my past so that I can move forward.
It can be difficult. But when you have nothing else to lose sometimes it forces us to make these types of leaps of faith in life.
After having my husband walk out several years ago. I had a lot of anger towards him. I finally got tired of feeling this way and I decided to let go of this feeling. I finally found someone special that loves and cares about me and my kids.
I had to let go of this past to move forward. Yes I have some hurt still but I am healing.
Cynthia, how did you know these are words I so needed to hear today? I want to print this and carry it with me always. Baby steps for me, and I have yet to take the first one, but this has helped so much. Thank you!
Cynthia, how did you know these are words I so needed to hear today? I want to print this and carry it with me always. Baby steps for me, and I have yet to take the first one, but this has helped so much. Thank you!
This is such an amazing post. I think where I fall on this is that once you can make that turn and almost fall in love, in acceptance at least with the thing that you hate the most…that "horrible" thing that seems to be dangling in front of you as the "one" thing that you want more than anything..the one thing that you know if you could just get over…you would be happy. Once you get on the other side of it…and see the pain as the beautiful gift that it is…see the present as exactly what you wanted in the first place….then, only then, can the manifestation of all we dreamed come about.
I had this exact thing happen to me last night (no doubt why I was drawn to your post today) ….where I finally let go of what I "thought" this situation I was in SHOULD be. I let go of this illusionary dream of what I thought I needed. And with just utter love and listening, I heard the truth of everything. I saw the realness of it all and I practically wept because I could finally see the thing that I was not accepting was the thing that released the pain in me. The thing that brought me the most peace. That acceptance of the fear of it all…was, in itself, the peace I was looking for.
This is so hard to explain…I have read it a million times and yet, hadn't experienced it in the powerful way I did last night.
Once again, beautiful post. I feel like I am floating.
Much love and light to you…
This is such an amazing post. I think where I fall on this is that once you can make that turn and almost fall in love, in acceptance at least with the thing that you hate the most…that "horrible" thing that seems to be dangling in front of you as the "one" thing that you want more than anything..the one thing that you know if you could just get over…you would be happy. Once you get on the other side of it…and see the pain as the beautiful gift that it is…see the present as exactly what you wanted in the first place….then, only then, can the manifestation of all we dreamed come about.
I had this exact thing happen to me last night (no doubt why I was drawn to your post today) ….where I finally let go of what I "thought" this situation I was in SHOULD be. I let go of this illusionary dream of what I thought I needed. And with just utter love and listening, I heard the truth of everything. I saw the realness of it all and I practically wept because I could finally see the thing that I was not accepting was the thing that released the pain in me. The thing that brought me the most peace. That acceptance of the fear of it all…was, in itself, the peace I was looking for.
This is so hard to explain…I have read it a million times and yet, hadn't experienced it in the powerful way I did last night.
Once again, beautiful post. I feel like I am floating.
Much love and light to you…