By joiseyshowaa (flickr)
Happy Self-love month!
We’re continuing our April commitment to actively practice self-love. Last week, I shared 21 Ways to Love Yourself. This week our self-love work is to set and uphold healthy boundaries—a LIFE CHANGING SKILL!
In March, my guest Robin Colucci joined me on my internet radio show to discuss the importance of boundaries and the response was so positive, and people had so many questions, that we decided to do another show. It seems that we all know that we need to set and uphold better boundaries. Why don’t we do it more? Robin and I got to the bottom of it!
The dictionary defines a boundary as something that indicates or fixes a limit.
When applied to our lives, boundaries are essentially structures and limits that, when consciously created and consistently enforced, open the way for our greatest expression of health, fulfilling relationships, creativity, success and well-being.
Boundaries are not just limitations on what you will not do, or will not allow, they can be positively expressed as things you’re committed to doing or being too.
Boundaries help you to define and take responsibility for your life. They are the key to being free to live the life you want. If you don’t set and enforce clear boundaries, it is very unlikely that you’ll reach your potential or feel happy with your life.
Listen to this week’s replay show on Hay House Radio as we take on several boundary dilemmas, including:
“I work with a group of people who are incredibly cliquey, gossipy and competitive. We work in a small space and it is hard to separate myself for the chaotic and uncollegial energy. How do you suggest I establish boundaries with these people without isolating myself?”
“My husband decided he could no longer live with me and his 2 daughters around 2-3 years ago. I have maintained cordial contact and access is regular-ish. His living arrangements are not great and so I have ended up storing his junk. I knew that NO was the correct response but ‘OK for a few months was what came out’ now of course every time I raise the issue an argument /myriad of excuses ensue. What to do?”
“As a single mother with very limited support and financial resources, how can I make my dream of being a published author become a reality? I write books that are novels, but I feel like they can expand people’s awareness and wonder about our Universe and themselves. It sometimes seems I don’t have the energy to even make dinner, let alone edit my first novel (I finished writing it about a year ago, right around the time my marriage imploded).”
There were also several calls about family boundaries, especially biological sisters who seem to cause a lot of grief! Oy!
Give yourself some LOVE and EMPOWERMENT right now! Listen to the replay:
BOUNDARIES & BLOCKS (available free until 4/12/13) on
Yesterday, I was waiting inside the city bus station on my way home and observed a man approach a young woman sitting a few seats from me. He sat down next to her, introduced himself, and began talking with her. She was polite, but guarded. In the middle of their conversation he said he would like to take her to lunch. She politely said, “Thank you, that was nice of you to ask.” And then firmly said “No.” In that instant, I thought, “Wow! This woman has awesome boundaries!” I liked the way she handled the situation. There was no anger in her voice. She was polite, direct, and confident about saying the word NO firmly. She happened to be taking the same bus as me and sat a couple seats away. I had to compliment her on her healthy boundaries. I said “I liked the way you handled the invitation to lunch. You were polite, but firm about saying NO. I learned alot in that instant about protecting my boundaries and will always remember how you handled this the next time I have a boundary situation come up.” With a confident smile and firm handshake she said “Thank you.”